For over five years the founder of Seek A Therapy lived in one of the most affluent areas in the ENTIRE world with more millionaires living in the vicinity than anywhere else.Having graduated with high hopes of maybe making it as a successful architect himself in 2008, the economic recession had other ideas. But is having money the true symbol of success anyway?
Living so close to affluent people made him realise his previous perception of value was wrong. His main goal of valuing himself as successful only through wealth, materialism and possessions was wrong. We should really choose to weigh our success by something much more difficult to achieve.
Read on if you want to know what those elements are so you can also start practising this new measure of human ‘success’.
Desire For ‘Things’ To Make Life Valued Starts Young Via Advertising
It is a scary thought to suggest but material desire starts young. It could be said, as youngsters we are conditioned into thinking that material things will make us happy.
Our festivities such as Christmas fester on this. The more presents you get from Santa, the better a child you have been. Good behaviour equals lots of material reward.
Removing the birth of christ as the focus and instead focusing on presents.
It is also the sense of giving which is very rewarding, but we can’t deny it does feel good to get new ‘things’. Due to this nature of gift giving and material gain many people now celebrate Christmas who are not even Christian. Many people celebrate it for the idea of sharing gifts with loved ones but also so they don’t feel like they are missing out.
Father Christmas, a man who used to give gifts to orphans, now has been ‘rebranded’ as the symbol of Christmas.
Corporations are cashing in. You may not realise but he used to wear a green suit until Coca-Cola ‘rebranded’ him to wear the same colour red as the coca-cola brand.
We are subconsciously stepping away from our true nature of what matters most to us.
Some of our most rewarding life experiences can include helping others, being spiritual, forgiving others and offering kindness. We should stop caring about ‘what we own’ and how much we have. Some of us have lost our way in the pursuit of material wealth and financial power. It is time to refocus ourselves on what wealth is.
Focus on Money And Materialism Can Be The Root Cause Of Unhappiness
With a heading such as this it may sound a bit hard to understand. When we value ourselves through money and materialism it can lead us to ‘unhappiness’ rather than contentment.
For many, having untold riches and wealth is difficult to attain, even with a good education. Unless they are from a family background that already has money or live in a location that offers opportunity to amass wealth.
Having this goal of money making and ‘things’ is difficult to achieve from a lower to middle-class background. It is ok to strive for wealth and comfort as long as it is alongside something more human. If you have this as your only goal or your top one it is likely to bring a sense of being unfilled and failure. Even the very wealthy still want more and will continue to feel unfulfilled.
Money, and the opportunity to possess it, is one reason the founder had a breakdown himself. The ability to achieve the wealth was more difficult from his birthplace. There were less jobs in that location and worse during the recession. There was a lot less wealth creation than in the likes of London.
Living In One Of The Richest Part Of The World Can Make Money As The Ultimate Life Goal Feel Shallow
Having lived in the south of England for four years John, the founder of Seek A Therapy, met people who have lots of wealth. Over a million in money and assets but it is STILL not enough for them. They desire even MORE wealth and MORE possessions, it’ll never be enough. I can’t help but feel this is the only way they can feel they have value and rate themselves as ‘successful’ people.
Heartfelt gratitude from North African locals
This experience when he met the local man further redeveloped his view on ‘the worth of money’ in his life.
It was a dream of mine to always visit Egypt since he was very young. To see the final ancient wonders of the world. He was extremely fortunate enough to visit Luxor when there wasn’t a single other traveller in the entire valley of the kings.
It was an incredible experience and made the visit incredibly special as he began his descent into Ramises III tomb.
As he walked down into the darkness of the crypt he was accompanied by a local Egyptian man at the entrance. Wearing green traditional clothing, white beard and dark wrinkled skin due to the hot weather, turban included. He was very smiley and pointing out pictures on the wall with great enthusiasm and using his small amount of ability to speak English fluently.
Genuine Gratitude Is Such A Powerful feeling
It was amazing to think he was walking in the footsteps of ancient Egyptians that would have walked the same path thousands of years earlier. The stories that were behind these pictures that led to their afterlife.
On arrival at the base of the tomb, it was just John, his wife and the local standing a the foot of a barrier.
The Egyptian asked John, would he like to stand where the Pharaoh would have had his coffin laid to rest? Feeling like it was too good an opportunity to miss he crossed the barrier to stand in the place few are ever allowed to. Simply incredible as he looked at the ceiling and saw many stars painted on the ceiling of the carved out mountain!
On return to the correct side of the barrier he offered the man a small tip of 20 Egyptian Pounds ($2) as thanks. In return he received a very ‘genuine’ gratitude for this small amount of money. He was offered one of the largest happiest smiles ever seen. Warm kind eyes. A strong embrace and a kiss on the arm and a shake of my hand.
John, of course, was taken aback by the gentle and forwardness but his act showed me the power and purpose of money.
In the right hands and with the right actions, money can change lives. How the feeling of giving it to those who truly need it or to positively impact people gives more reward than aiming to possess lots of it for the self.
Never have I felt such a huge satisfaction from owning something material in comparison to seeing when I really helped someone feel happiness. The value of the two things cannot compare.
John – Founder of Seek A Therapy
The real value of money is not to make ourselves feel powerful and comfortable in our own lives. Although this can be a nice extra if possible. Money, when shared and put into the right areas and with the right people, can really make the world a better place for so many.
Don’t value how much money you have, value how many people’s lives you can make better.
Even If We Have No Money We Can Still Help Others
Rather than valuing life by how much one can own, we can value our worth by how genuinely kind we can be. Trying to focus on this and hopefully making a positive contribution to other people’s lives we come into contact with. Whoever we meet, be genuinely kind, tolerant and understanding.
Before Egypt, I also visited the Sistine Chapel a year earlier in Rome and stood gazing up at the famous painting by Michelangelo. Upon his death, he has the equivalent in todays money of £45 million if not more in his bank. But did you know he was also wife and childless? What was the use of his wealth once dead? Money at that point becomes valueless.
With no children and no wife, he wasn’t truly wealthy, but materially, he was beyond most people’s capability…
What’s the point in money with no one to share it with?!?
The Three New Ways To Value Wealth & Self Worth
The following three aspects are what we should be valuing how wealthy a person’s life has truly been.
Is Having Money The True Symbol Of Success? Not If You Don’t Have Lots Of Experiences
If we just work, work, work and work some more maybe watch some television and then grow old and die what was the point? Seeeeeeeeriously!!! Get out! See the world! Travel! Life is to be lived not just exist :).
People that just work so hard, amass lots of money but forget to live. Is this a good way to live?
John’s wife once worked for an Indian businessman who never gave a single weekend off EVERY month for 9 months.
They never saw each other and they never did anything together for that period other than a 2 week holiday.
Fortunately, she left that job but this is a clear example of focusing on money. If we constantly work and forget to enjoy ourselves in between, before we know it, our bodies will age. We will be pensioners and not experienced much in between getting there. By the way if you are a pensioner, it is never too late to start experiences!
So I guess the message here is rather than just value how much we earn or possess value experiences. How much time do you spend doing the things you love and experience new things? This is where real wealth is found, enjoying life and gaining experiences. When you look back at life at the age of 70+ do you want lots of photo albums or a lot of things and money in your bank? I am not saying you can’t have both but we should always first enjoy life even before the money arrives.
Is Having Money The True Symbol Of Success? No Kindness And Compassion Are
Not everyone has the ability to put themselves in the shoes of others.
It is great when you see something on the news and can acknowledge what a terrible thing happened but remain tolerant and understanding of people of that society you come into contact with.
What about the people suffering in poverty in Africa or the thousands upon thousands of people dying in the middle east. o
Or even that arrogant boss that really you’d like to put them straight but you instead try to see the other person’s point of view and try to understand why they are acting in the way they do?
If you can do this and offer kindness to everyone you meet and want the best for ALL people then you are reaching an incredible level of human integrity.
A wealth that cannot be measured.
Is Having Money The True Symbol Of Success? Not If There Is No Love
You can’t buy love. Consider the story about the genie in the bottle. He CAN grant you untold riches but he CANNOT grant you the ability to force anyone to love you. Finding true love or someone to share life with is priceless.
It may not be a partner it may be a few good friends , love comes in many forms.
Some may think that there is no one out there for them, no one who understands them, share the same interests as them or has the same way of thinking.
It is true, to find the person who is exactly you in the opposite sex can be hard but we are missing the point.
We believe the key to a happy relationship is not in just our similarities or what we think we want our partner to look like. It is the ability to accept our differences and discovering, learning and appreciating those things. Even the things that might annoy us can also be loved.
There are many ways to find true love and accessing dating apps can help if you find the right app. Get on match.com or another dating website and start meeting people for coffee and a chat. Someone to share life with is waiting out there for you. I can guarantee you!! If you don’t want a partner, then why not find a website to make some friends instead.
Is Having Money The True Symbol Of Success? NO, Money Doesn’t Equate A Successful Life
So to conclude, having untold riches may make one feel powerful and bring some sense of comfort knowing you have nice things and don’t have to worry about making ends meet . In fact, being rich can feel good for a short while but likewise, be aware being rich must also have its own stresses and strains.
‘Keeping up’ with those living across the street from you. The more money you get, the more careful you need to be when you choose friends or a partner. How can you honestly know for sure people are respecting you for you. Enjoying your company just for being with you and not because they are benefiting from knowing you? They may only love you for your money and position rather than the person you are and that must be a stress too.
Money makes the world go round…or does it?
Finally, ask yourself these questions next time you are thinking if you had money your life would be better. Understand having money is fine but we shouldn’t make it our main life goal.
Once you have lots of money and material objects will you have enough time to enjoy it?
When you come to the day you are about to die what use is money then?
Do you want to look back towards your life and say you created a vast amount of wealth and purchased many objects? Alternatively, do you want to say you experienced many wonders and tried to leave the world a better place for others?
What do you want to with your life if you could do anything? Would you want to paint more? Or maybe you want to create a photography exhibition? Would you want to skydive? Whatever it is, make it a goal and set out a way of making it happen, it will bring your more contentment than money is likely to and lastly…remember the three real values of how to measure your worth.
What If Money Were No Object?
FInally, watch this short video to help understand how to create a life of value and success! Next time you ask yourself, is having money the true symbol of success, you will be able to answer NO.
Is Having Money The True Symbol Of Success?
No! How we NEED TO really value a successful human is not from the pocket but from the wealth someone has in their heart and how they POSITIVELY IMPACT OTHERS LIVES.