We can’t ignore it, social media is HUGE nowadays and is very popular. It has infiltrated every aspect of our lives. So vastly that it is difficult not to be a part of it. Even if you don’t really want to be. It could be said that it has almost made the telephone and tv redundant as people begin to stay in touch and discover what loved ones are doing via apps. Or they choose to catch up with an old friend who lives on the other side of the world via Skype. Sometimes discovering the latest sports news before it even hits the newspapers. Social media has made us all more connected to each other but does have its downsides. In this article, we discuss ten things that will help you if you ever ask yourself… how do I improve my relationship with social media?

In this post, we discuss ten things that we should keep in mind to keep our digital social life positive and healthy.





1. How Many Followers/Friends You Have Does Not Equal Popularity or How Successful You Are

How Do I Improve My Relationship with social media

A lot of people equate having lots of followers/friends/likes/retweets/favourites as the symbol of social success. Truly though, what is the point in amassing that many digital friends?

Few of them you truly know. In fact, it is almost impossible for a human being to know more than 150 people. (Ss Rob from Ashwood Therapy discussed in his latest article ‘false friends’). So we must learn to stop worrying about how many people we ‘know’. We must instead focus on connecting to the people that matter most to us. For most of us, it is our family. It could be said that the most successful people are not the ones that have lots of ‘friends’. It is those who can define just a few people to spend their time with.

2. Remember, People Only Post Their Best Photos Of Their Life

Secondly, how often do you trail through Instagram looking at perfect abs, people having fun at a party or doing some amazing extreme sport? What you must remember is no one posts pictures of themselves when they just get out of bed or having a really down day…those days get edited out so all you see on people’s social feed is their ‘happy’ times. It is

What you must remember is no one posts pictures of themselves when they just get out of bed or having a really down day…those days get edited out so all you see on people’s social feed is their ‘happy’ times.

It is almost impossible to always have a happy time in life, in fact, if all the time was happy there would be no happy, things would be a lot more grey than the colours of life that ups and downs bring! Unfortunately, although we like not to have them, we all need the bad times in life in order to appreciate the good times. Just remember next time you see someone you think is doing a lot better than you just remember, you aren’t seeing the whole picture but also learn to be happy for those people that are sharing their happy time with you to view.

3.How Do I Improve My Relationship with social media? Connect ONLY With People And Business That Make You Feel Good

How Do I Improve My Relationship with social media? Connect only with good people. A picture of happy people

Next on the list is to consider who you are connecting with via social media. If you are following Facebook pages that are often angering you because of injustice or bullying, trolling or bringing up any negative emotion, simply…’unlike’ them. Detox the negativity from your social profile. Follow only people that spread positivity, bring a smile to your face or make you feel good and nothing that brings you or others down.

4. Do Not Compare Your Life

How Do I Improve My Relationship with social media? Do not compare your life with others. NEVER compare your life to somebody else. You simply can’t do this and maintain a sense of peace in your life.

Social media has made more evident that many of us are not born equal. We are not given equal chances…whether from country to country or region to region.

The sense of injustice may be high but you must accept the cards that we have been dealt with. We must learn to be appreciative of the little things that you have that many others don’t.

In fact, the power of gratitude can completely change your perspective on life. It can help you realise, you don’t need to be like somebody else or have the same material wealth as others to be content and happy. What truely matters most is that you are your genuine self and able to express yourself. Realising, comparing yourself to someone who has had different luck, born into a wealthy family or given opportunity and birthrights that you may not have had is destructive for your mental health and happiness.

5. Ignore the conspiracy theorists

There are many conspiracy theorists out there, some may be true, but most are probably not. When you feel a sense of injustice in your own life it is quite easy to pick these up. Something to believe in and distract you from your own self. This can, in turn, make the world feel darker than it actually is. (The world is mostly full of good and beauty, it is important to focus on that.) Although some conspiracy theories may be correct if there is nothing we can do about it should we choose to ignore it?

So, if you follow any conspiracy theorist pages or accounts I would recommend unfollowing them asap.



6. Turn Notifications Off From People Who Annoy You

How Do I Improve My Relationship with social media? Remove arrogant and self loving people from your feed

When we make friends with others on Facebook we often don’t always have the same opinions. It should be easy to realise when you ask yourself How Do I Improve My Relationship with social media, its time to remove negative nellies!

Our political opinions can be different, our humour, our views on the world, pretty much everything! So when our news feed starts to get filled up with things that upset us it affects our mental health. To stop this you can turn off notifications from particular users. This will stop their posts appearing in your feed, decluttering your information intake without insulting anyone.

7. How Do I Improve My Relationship With Social Media? Reduce Automated Notifications

Is your phone constantly beeping with new messages and notifications…Simon Cowell just tweeted…followed by Katy perry just posted a photo to Facebook just two minutes later? Constantly looking at your phone is distracting you from living in the moment. Look at your social accounts and try to find ways of reducing notifications from your smartphone …now that would be a smart move for your mental health!

8. Leave Your Mobile In Another Room Before Bed

Do you look at your social media accounts before you sleep and as you wake up in the morning?

I know I have been a victim of this…

Social media can be really detrimental to your overall well-being. You are not allowing your brain to relax before settling for sleep or waking up slowly.

Sleep, is probably one of the most important things we do to maintain good mental (Healing from depression ) see this blog post about sleeping)and emotional health and if you sleep with your smartphone next to your bed you can be sent many notifications and although you may not wake up, your sleep will be disturbed and stop you getting a completely full rest.

To combat these two issues think about either putting your phone on aeroplane mode. Or placing your phone in another room to recharge and get the ultimate night’s rest.

9. How Do I Improve My Relationship with social media? Use Social Media To Express Yourself

Social media does get a bad rep. Sometimes rightly so but social media can be a force for lots of good. (Hey I bet you came to read this blog from a social media channel right?).

Like all things there is something good and bad about social media. Social media channels can connect you to like-minded people who may appreciate your thoughts and interests.  Knowing there are others that think similarly to you and enjoy the same things can give you a bit of a boost and motivation. A boost to follow your passions and dreams. So whatever it is you like doing don’t be afraid to share it with the world. 90% of people will respond positively.

If people are negative just let it go over your head and move on. Keep following your dreams and hobbies, it can be fantastic for your self-esteem and feelings of contentment in your life.

10. Have A Day of Digital Detox Each Month

is inner happiness achievable

Lastly, have you ever considered a digital detox? I once had a whole week of not using Facebook to see if I would miss it. Surprisingly, I was a lot more productive with my time. I got a lot more tasks completed than when I had an account.

Taking some time to detach from social media and our phones can really help us. We can make more from our time, changing how we perceive ourselves and the world around us. Whilst also giving us time to enhance real relationships that matter most to us.

Altering Our Relationships With Our Digital Selves And Social Media Tools.

Social media used in the right way can enhance your life. But it can easily spiral into a negative habit if overused. Or if you feel your life isn’t heading it the direction that you hoped, it can bring on negative connotations.

Learning how to make social media enhance your life and not damage it is important. Something that we should be learning to incorporate into our lives.

So How Do I Improve My Relationship with social media In A Nutshell?

So to re-iterate the 10 points that we believe can enhance your relationship with social media is : –

  1. Declutter your ‘friends’, don’t be friends with random people or those you don’t interact with anymore.
  2. What you see on social media channels is usually the best version of that person. It is not really a balanced view of people’s true lives.
  3. Connect with business and people that truly make you feel good about life.
  4. Stop comparing yourself we all start off with different backgrounds and have varying achievements in our own rights.
  5. Don’t follow conspiracy theorists, it only makes you angry.
  6. Turn off notifications from people whos posts don’t resonate with you.
  7. Reduce notifications 
  8. Disconnect from social media at least half hour before and after sleeping.
  9. Do use social media to express yourself and connect to like minds
  10. Sometimes choose to have no digital access for 24 hours once a month. Or challenge yourself to a week without social media.





Social media has enhanced our lives but it does have drawbacks. If we become more conscious of the positives and negatives of these tools we can remain healthy.  So next time you ask yourself how do I improve my relationship with social media, these ten points will help!

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