It is human nature to always want to progress and to pursue comfort, happiness and freedom and most people think that there is only one way to achieve these 3 things… money. Money and the pursuit of ever-growing wealth is the pursuit of most of us, we go to work to pay our mortgage/rent, to raise our children and to buy our food and the constant weekly working torment to achieve these important commodities of life never ceases to end. In this blog post, the founder of BoM John discusses the importance of not focusing on what we don’t have but on appreciating the things we do…even the poorest person can be extremely wealthy!
Our perception of the rich man, is it right?
They’ve got it all, they can do whatever they want when they want, they are admired and highly successful, they must be really happy having no worries right? Wrong! In my time working as a brand and web designer it gave me the opportunity to work closely with several wealthy CEOs. The observations I made were yes, they had some beautiful material objects, a nice home, nice cars, the ability to buy the latest gadgets, and the most expensive vacations. It may appear to many that they are fortunate, comfortable, and happy but being successful or rich, it doesn’t give them special rights to being some kind of superhuman, they still have problems but of a slightly different ilk to us.
With all ‘wealthy’ people I have met over the years and got to know on a personal level it appears sometimes they don’t know what to do with their money once they reach a comfortable level. One of them bought lots of cars but why do you need lots of cars when there is only one of us? Another had to buy the latest gadget before anyone else so he felt some sense of importance in his life but within 6 months to a year it was no longer the latest thing and so had to buy something new and show it off to everyone…this may sound like I am being envious but it isn’t. These people bought things that they didn’t need because they almost have no need for money. What do you do if you no longer have a need to pay your bills??
Another person I know was born into wealth, a middle eastern woman who although from a very comfortable background in terms of wealth she has no freedom to do what she wants. It is a sad state of affairs that even though materially comfortable she is unable to experience the real wealth of true freedom to be who you truly are and have the option to travel the world when we want.
These two examples of the successful person and the person born into wealth show that being rich is relative and doesn’t mean that they are completely content.
Our perception of the poor man
On the contrast, our perception of the poor man/woman is a person who has failed at life, has got nothing, is the lowest form of the person within society, is a person who has no friends, no recognition, no intelligence and no money, a person who no one wants to be. But is a poor person really not ‘wealthy?’
A poor man is only poor if ‘he’ or ‘she’ believes themselves to be. Just because a person doesn’t have the latest gadget or a big house does not mean they are not wealthy. How is that possible? Well, real wealth is more than just material goods…
What is real wealth?
Real wealth can only be valued by how happy or contented a person is. As previously mentioned, the rich men I spoke about were definitely NOT contented.
Just because someone is wealthy materially does not equate to a happy person. The way to measure how wealthy a person is is how they see the world and how they treat others they come into contact with.
How to become wealthy
But how do we become wealthy? Being happy, living with peace of mind, or achieving our perceived abundance needs to be studied, mastered, and worked for.
Firstly, learning how to set and hold a thought that is positive in its intention so to develop your conscious desires, rather than unconscious fears is where your wealth begins. How do you do this if suffering from depression? It is extremely difficult, I know because I had to do it.
I recommend starting with goal setting ( read this goal-setting blog ) and writing a shortlist of what you’d like to change ( or achieve ). Do this, no matter how unrealistic you think it might be, having that goal at least written down will give you a focus to look at as you attempt to change your thoughts.
Next, is to keep a book about gratitude ( read this blog about gratitude). This is a book, similar to a diary where you write 10 things that you are grateful for every single day. It can be tricky at first but they don’t have to be big things, just small things like enjoying a tv program, having a comfortable bed, having more motivation this day. Continued repetition of this process can begin to give you a more positive outlook towards life.
Lastly, but it could be the most important is…
How can we achieve this thing we believe could change our lives for the better?
Where you are right now, if reading this, is probably near the bottom of your personal mountain…it looks a long way up to the top from where you are standing but it is completely possible to achieve your goals to make you a more ‘wealthy’ person but you must make a list of how you can achieve your goals.
I can give an example of my own life…
For those of you who do not know about me…after I reached rock bottom at 27, having no money, actually I was in debt by £30k, completed 2 degrees with little opportunity, a fiancee left me, my immediate family were not happy, I had n car, no house and my only blessing was I had a family. I was actually assessed at high risk of suicide. I was very depressed, I hardly went out, only when it was very dark. I slept a lot, I mean, a lot and motivating myself was hard at first but i knew something had to change so I started by setting goals, writing them down.
I knew I’d put on weight with my depression so one goal was to lose weight, secondly, I felt the UK wasn’t giving me the opportunity so I thought id learn Spanish to expand my opportunity in the world for job opportunities and also, I had always liked Latino women so would have that benefit too, thirdly I dreamed of making millions and decided to learn web design in order to be able to reach out to the world.
So setting these goals, things I really wanted to achieve deep down helped me to get more ‘wealthy’. I used wii fit and walking a dog to get fit and managed to lose 2 stone in 6 months, secondly, I met a Colombian woman who I did date for a while until I met my wife, thirdly and finally, I had made web sites for several people, created a portfolio and secured my first job…in London.
I did all this within a year of first falling severally ill with depression and it wasn’t all a smooth ride, even after I’d achieved these goals I was still feeling depressed and anxious to fairy high levels for years afterward, but I guess the most important message is, to start.
Start today, write down up to 4 goals, one of them can be extreme but please do it! Set goals and then think….how can I achieve these goals, what thing or skill do I need to get it?
Your life can change, your life can be happy! Good luck and please let me know about your journey by commenting below!